People tend to suppress their natural inclination toward friendship, as once these impulses are exposed in personal life, individuals often feel anxious when facing society—a common phenomenon in the UK. People work hard to control themselves, trying to avoid being hurt too deeply. They focus all their emotions inward, whether they like it or not. As long as they don’t intend to deceive you selfishly, they act in their own way. They become rigid, dogmatic, weak, timid, and passive. They wear a special armor to hide the frightened child inside. As a result, social interactions become awkward and dull, friendships fade away, and love turns into a gray version of what it should be.
Many people quote a line from Browning:
"Thank God, you created this hard-to-servate guy. There are two sides to the heart, while facing the worldly life and showing off to his beloved woman."
I’m not a psychoanalyst, but if I were, I’d want to explore Brown’s gratitude. The soul he used to face the world was one that felt free to explore life without fear of pain or ridicule. It was open, unburdened by harsh truths. But the other side of his mind—his showy, vain, and rhetorical side—was reserved for his beloved. When he faced someone of the same social circle, he never dared to display that side. This second part of his mind is shaped by fear. The first side keeps everything closed, preventing any fresh ideas or emotions from entering. Unless it's showcased, the soul isn't allowed to breathe. The outside world feels bleak, while the inner world remains self-contained. This is not how relationships should be. Healthy relationships should be spontaneous and genuine. Vanity should be less, and the heart lighter.
The habit of self-restraint doesn’t just allow self-deception to grow quietly; it also drains energy from the positive aspects of life, as so much is wasted on maintaining a negative self-image. This habit has a bigger flaw: it makes people more determined to hide their natural desire for connection. Once such impulses are revealed, they feel extremely vulnerable. The short-term monotony and long-term mental rigidity are the results of this social fear.
Editor: (Hardware Business Network Information Center)
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